Back to basics - Planting seeds of good character
You never outgrow the need for good character. Young people need solid standards, and so do their parents. Focusing on the quality of your own character will help you teach, reinforce, advocate and model the following:
These characters above including [ethical decision making] from the basis of honorable behavior at every age. It’s not easy, but with persistence and consistency, our future generation will have the best character there is. We will continue our discussion with *Responsibility and will continue to cover the remainder throughout the week. Here’s a simple guild on the do’s and don’ts when it comes to building amazing trustworthy character in your Muslim child.
But first...what is the definition of responsibility?
Responsibility is doing what you are supposed to do. Responsible people think ahead, set reasonable goals, control their tempers and always do their best. They don’t give up easily, especially when others are counting on them. They are accountable for the consequences of their choices; they don't blame others for their mistake.
- Think before you act. Consider the consequences for yourself and others. Then decide whether the action is trustworthy, respectful, responsible, fair, caring and mark of good citizenship for everyone affected by the decision. This is a skill and requires you to guide your child to think through each decision made, whether he/she is aware of the choices they are making or not. It’s up to you as the adult to bring this to your child's attention and guild them to become more aware of their choices and how their choices affects those around them. Click here & download your free Cause & Affect Worksheet!
- Be accountable. Take responsibility for the consequences of your actions(or lack of action).
- Be reliable. Always perform your duties. This is modeled through your behavior as a parent. If your child asks for help in homework, or spend time with you and you inform your child you will be able to be their after sending out emails. It’s crucial to show [through modeled behavior] how to say what you mean and mean what you say, which further shows/tells your child what “reliable” looks and sounds like.
- Set a good example in what you say and do. Act as if someone whose respect you want is always watching.
- Take the initiative to make your school, organizations, neighborhood or home better for yourself first, and others.
- Do your best! Make everything you do worthy of pride. Stick to it! Meet your responsibilities even when it is difficult.
- Finish your work before you play.
- Don’t blame others for your mistakes.
- Don’t take credit for other people’s work or accomplishments. Always be mindful and responsible to show appreciation towards people who help you become your best.
- Don’t give up.
- Don’t neglect your duties toward yourself and others.
- Don’t undermine your best work or effort. Ever! You are always in constant iteration. Always reflect, analyze what worked, what didn't, make the necessary changes and move forward.
What does Prophet Muhammed(s) say about the importance of good character? Check out the following Hadith.
*Hadith denotes documentation of the prophet Muhammad's actions, behaviors, and the silent approval in different situations and/or circumstances. It is a Muslim guild to live a noble and worthy lifestyle.
Abu Hurayrah said that the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace, said, "If one has good manners, one may attain the same level of merit as those who spend their nights in prayer."
Abu Hurayrah said, "I heard Abu al Qasim (the Prophet), upon him be peace, say, 'The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners, so long as they develop a sense of understanding."
'Abd Allah ibn 'Amr said, "There are four characteristics that, if you possess them, will prevent you from being affected if you are deprived of certain worldly benefits. They are good character, chaste outlook, honesty, and trustworthiness."
Reference: Imam Bukhari’s Book of Muslim Morals and Manners. Translated by Yusuf Takak-DeLorenzo. Published by Al-Saadawi Publications
Mark your calendar! Next blog post: April 25, 2018 Topic: Fairness.